Tuesday 25 September 2007

Knitterly Denial

I looked at the pattern. Looked at the yarn and thought "72 stitches will be HUGE". I cast on 60. I knit a round or two. It looked waaaaay to big. I frogged. I cast on 48 stitches. I knit for a while, thought "this might be just a weeeeny bit tight. I knit on. I tried the sock on. It was still a liiiiiitle tight. I thought it might grow a bit with the washing and grandma has much thinner legs anyway. I continued to knit. I tried on. I felt there was still hope. I finished the sock. I tried on. No two ways about it, it's too tight. I washed. It did not grow as hoped. It remained the same. I thought since the damn thing says "unshrinkable yarn" that it would still grow because that would be sod's law, but alas, it did not. This is known as reverse sod's law.

Currently, I'm trying to convince myself that if it was too tight for me, it should be OK for Grandma because she really does have much thinner legs than me (I have the calves from hell. Doesn't matter how much weight I lose, my calves refuse to give up a mm of circumfrance and remain the size of small elephant legs. I console myself with the knowledge that it is really all muscle, and at least I still have ankles. Wonder if you could make rump steak out of them? Lord knows I wouldn't miss them). I'm going to make the second one come hell or high water. If all else fails, I'll just hunt someone down who has really thin legs and randomly present them with a pair of socks. Anyone have Keira Knightly's address?

Knitterly denial or have the Pink Gods been colluding with the Green Sock Gods to make my life hell? I'll go for the latter. That would make it less my own fault. After all, no one owns up to fault anymore, why should I?

At least no one can sue me for this, can they?

3 comments:

  1. You kill me! I think your wit has mine beat all to H***.

    If you keep punishing that sock, it'll learn sooner or later. ;o)

    Instead of this commenting back & forth, wanna send me email?
    electra_nina at yahoo

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  2. Aw, bummer! I do the same thing with my knitting sometime. I have done MANY trips to the frog pond because of too loose/too tight knitting. Then I learned to always gauge swatch, now it doesn't happen as much. AS MUCH! ha ha..

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  3. Seriously?? That is too crazy. I didn't know you were an Aggie, too!!!! That is just way too weird. From Fresno and went to UCD!!!! When were you there? I was there from 94-98. Worked at the CRPRC for a year after, then was at Sac St (sucks) for a year to get my teaching credential.

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